What's in a Name?
by Estates General
Summary: Courfeyrac and Grantaire make a bet on who can discover the name of Marius' beloved. Idiocy and general oddity ensues. For Achilles Maiden for being so supportive. (Abandoned.)
1. Marius! You're late!

E.G: Lovingly dedicated to Achilles Maiden, for being awsome. :D

Summary: Grantaire and Courfeyrac make a bet on who can get Marius to speak the name of his beloved.

Disclaimer: The Fic is mine! (And A.M's. For it is a gift, mind you!) The characters belong to Hugo!

Coufeyrac glanced up from his late night do-at-the-last-minute Latin research to see Marius float through the door on cloud nine.

"Marius! Where have you been? It's almost one thirty!" Coufeyrac cried, glancing at his watch.

"I was out," he said simply.

"Alright, Marius, who is she?" Coufeyrac asked impatiently.

"Who's who?"

"Don't play dumb, who's the girl you're staying out all night to meet with?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Marius said blandly.

"I said stop playing dumb,"

"I'm not playing," Marius said in the same monotone.

Coufeyrac laughed outright, "Sure, Marius!"

"You know what I mean!"

"Of course I know. Now, c'mon, please? For an old friend?" Coufeyrac asked, making pathetic puppy eyes at him.

Marius remained dutifully silent as he hung up his coat.

"Marius, Marius, _Marius_, you could tell me now, or I could follow you and bother you until I find out"

"You wouldn't _really_," Marius said uncertainly, now starting to feel a bit flustered.

"I wouldn't?" Coufeyrac asked, pulling on a hilariously exaggerated solemn face.

"Don't follow me, I have a right to my privacy!" Marius cried, acting as his inner lawyer told him to.

"Oh yeah, that's right, there's a law against that, isn't there? Courfeyrac for a moment, before leaning back in his chair, resting his feet on top of the table (Carefully avoiding his Latin homework), "Oh well, it's either I follow you and I become the worst nuisance you'll ever know or you could end your misery before it happens,"

Marius looked at him in such a state of astonishment that Courfeyrac couldn't restrain the big, goofy grim.

"Honestly, Marius, I'm pretty sure I have better things to do than follow you around,"

Marius heaved a relieved yet slightly irritated sigh.

"But don't think for a second that I don't want to know!"

"Courfeyrac!"

"What? These stupid 'top secret' romances drive me up a wall!"

"So? It's my romance!"

"So? I want, nay, _need_ to know who!"

"No you don't!"

"Please tell me her name!

"No!"

"Just give me an initial!"

"No!"

"Hair color?"

"No!"

"Eye color?"

"No!"

"Height?"

"No!"

"Anything?!"

"**No!**"

"It's either I find out or die trying!" Coufeyrac cried, sitting upright in his chair again.

"Courfeyrac, its no big deal, just don't think about it," Marius lied; Cosette was the meaning of his life.

"You and I both know that's the farthest from the truth," Courfeyrac said, smirking.

"Yeah, I know, and it is a big deal, but it's **my** big deal,"

"And **you** don't intend on sharing,"

"Not one bit,"

The young womanizer sighed unhappily, "Okay, fine, I won't bother you for the time being,"

"And the white flag flies!" Marius cried joyously.

"But when Capitol Soap Bubble pops, you _will_ tell me then, deal?"

"Deal," Marius knew he was safe on this deal; Capitol Soap Bubble would stand strong twice as long as Rome did!

E.G: DON'T THINK FOR A SECOND THAT THAT'S WHERE IT ENDS! **MORE TO COME!**


	2. Strike one!

E.G: Still dedicated to Achilles Maiden, for being a nice reviewer.

Disclaimer: Yatta yatta blah blah, Les Mis is Mr. Hugo's.

The next day after failing his Latin and kicking himself for not being able to get a name out of Marius, Courfeyrac stormed into the café for an early dinner.

"Wus wiff ya, Cou –hic- Courfeyrac?" Grantaire asked as Courfeyrac plopped down into a chair at a near-by table.

"Marius is what's up,"

"Trouble in paradise?" Grantaire asked taking a sip from his glass.

"No! He's gotten all lovey-dovey with some girl and he won't tell me who she is," Courfeyrac smacked a hand to his forehead, "God I can't **stand **these stupid little romances!"

"Whatsh the big deal? Mariush can float –hic- around in hish little world for as long ash he wa –hic- nts, 'sides, it's his lass, he'll shay so sooner er somethin'"

"That's just it, **he hasn't said so yet**!"

Grantaire winced "Not sho loud, 'sides, how hard could it be to get him to tell? I mean, he'sh not da shmartest guy," Grantaire paused, thoughtfully "I bet I could get 'im to talk"

"I bet neither of us could get him to talk," Courfeyrac countered, fiddling with his cuff.

Grantaire looked up from his wineglass, "Do I smell a wager?"

"Huh?" Coufeyrac looked up from his cuff.

"I bet I could get the guy ta talk," Grantaire repeated.

"Really? You know, I sense a wager, too," Coufeyrac got up from his seat and sat down at Grantaire's table.

"That'sh the spirit,"

"So what are the stakes?"

"Hows bout if I win" Grantaire paused to take another swig from his glass, "You have to go," He thought for only a moment, "6 months without going near a woman,"

"That's torture! That's cruel! That's ludicrous! That's- that's . . . _horrifying _. . ._" _Courfeyrac sputtered, before gulping, "Well, R, _when _I get Marius to tell me, you have to stay sober for _**8 **_months,"

"Jesus, no!"

"Yep, or if you want to bail out—"

"Fine!"

Coufeyrac stood up and jut a hand out to Grantaire, "You have your self a bet,"

Grantaire shook it saying, "And may the besht man win,"

E.G: Tomorrow is Election Day. And I, being the life long Republican I am, am scared out of my effin' mind about what's to come.

'One more day before the storm' indeed! .


	3. Follow the Leader

E.G: Wo-kay!

Disclaimer: Idea is mine; Coufeyrac, Grantaire, and Marius belong to Hugo. And Vodka belongs to Russia.

Yeah, the first part maybe a tad obvious, but just in case people skipped over the first two! Gotta double check!

And my apologies, this chapter's so damn long!

~*~*~*~*~*

"So it's agreed? Whoever can tell the loser what her name is is the winner, alright," Coufeyrac said as he stood.

"Well that's pretty obvious, the on who findsh out fisht needsh ta tell," Grantaire said, taking a sip, "'Sides, whatsh da point if da ozzer don't tell?"

Coufeyrac nodded, "Good point"

~*~*~*~*

"Hello my bestity best friend, Marius," Courfeyrac said sweetly, once left the café and went home to find Marius silently reading on the couch.

"Hello, friend-and-roommate-who-is-still-not-getting-her-name Courfeyrac," Marius replied, not looking up.

"Whose name?" Coufeyrac feigned surprise, "Oh, your lady's? Oh, I don't care about her anymore,"

"Yes you do, you're lying,"  
"No I'm not, can't I just say how much I value our friendship without being accused of wanting something in return?"

"Uh, not really, no, at least you haven't _yet_ . . . "

"I'm deeply hurt, Marius! Deeply wounded! In fact, I've never been more insulted in my life!"

"Then you should get out more," Marius said simply, turning a page.

"Ouch! Marius! Put an arrow through my heart!"

"You're starting to scare me, Courfeyrac . . ."

"Sorry . . ." Courfeyrac paused, "Aren't you going to tell me?"  
"Huh? Tell you what?"

"Her name of course!"

"Of course not,"

"Why not?"  
"Because She's an angel!"

"C'mon! You can trust me!"

"I wouldn't tell the Pope!"

"The pope isn't sitting in front of you! I am! And I need to know!!"

"Courfeyrac, I swear to God, if you ask me one more time I will rip your tongue out and make you eat it,"

Marius gave him a last angry sidelong glance before slamming his book shut and stomping out of the apartment.

"Wait! Where are you going?!" Courfeyrac demanded, standing.

"The Library!" Marius snapped, slamming the door behind him.

Courfeyrac heaved a sigh and peered out the window and waited until he saw Marius leave the building before running from the room and down the back staircase.

Once he hit the street, he was making tracks as he sped towards the nearest library.

5 MINUTES LATER.

Marius stormed into the library and plopped down at a table next to a man reading a newspaper.

"What's the matter, lad?" the newspaper man asked in a very deep voice.

"A friend of mine is trying to find out my love's name," Marius grumbled, opening his book.

The man crumpled the newspaper, "So you were going to tell a complete stranger your secret and not me?" Courfeyrac demanded, throwing the paper aside.

"Whuh--? Courfeyrac! How'd you get here so quickly?" Marius demanded.

Courfeyrac moved his hat in order to wipe his sweaty forehead with his sleeve, "I ran twenty-six blocks," he replaced his hat and looked at Marius with a grin, "That's determination,"

"That's insanity,"

"No it's not, will power is a very powerful thing!" Courfeyrac said leaning forward, "Are you gonna tell me?"

Marius answer was to slam his book shut, stand up again and storm out the door.

Courfeyrac gulped, he hoped that his time, Marius would flee to somewhere closer. After waiting for Marius to turn the corner before leaping out of his seat and running out the door trailing behind Marius.

ANOTHER 5 MINUTES LATER

Marius quietly stepped into the church he regularly attended, looking around earnestly for any sign of his wayward womanizing roommate before sitting down in a pew in the back, taking out his old rosary, closing his eyes, kneeling, and crossing himself.

He was only there for a few seconds before he felt a tap on his shoulder, "Who're ya prayin' for?"

Marius' eyes flew open as he tumbled off his knees and onto the ground, "Courfeyrac!"

It was, in fact, Courfeyrac kneeling next to him, a large smirk on his face, "The one and only,"

"What are you doing here?!"

"Stop yelling! We're in a church!" Courfeyrac said in a stage whisper.

Marius indignantly stood, grabbed Courfeyrac by the arm and dragged him out of the building.

"Well, Marius, that's rather rude just yanking someone—"

"Courfeyrac, shut up." Marius silenced, "If you keep following me, I'll get that Inspector and have you arrested,"

"But--" Courfeyrac started.

"Shush! I'm going home now, good-bye," Marius lied; he had no intention of going home, before turning around and walking away.

Courfeyrac shrugged while watching him go before following him.

A few minutes past this way before Marius glance behind, caught sight of Courfeyrac and began to run as fast as he could down the boulevard.

"Hey! No, Marius!" Courfeyrac ran a few steps feebly, at this point he was far to tired to put a pursuit.

Courfeyrac slapped a hand to his forehead, "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

E.G: This remains for Achilles Maiden


	4. A Lawyer, A Medic, A Statue and R

E.G: This chapter is too long! Sorry if it takes a long time to read.

Disclaimer: Enjy-Glomper isn't Victor Hugo.

TEN MINUTES MORE!

Enjolras and Combeferre looked up from hunching over their Revolution plans to see Marius stomp into the Musain and plop down into a chair.

"Dare I ask what you're so mad about?" Combeferre asked.

Marius snapped his head up and glared at them meaningfully.

"Fair enough," Enjolras said, Combeferre shrugged before hunching back over the plans.

Grantaire looked up from his corner table, and broke into a huge horse-like grin when he saw the young Democrat through a hazy fog that clouded his intoxicated mind, "Marius! Have a glass of wine!" He called, moving from his usual table to Marius' spot, taking with him, his bottle and snatching two wineglasses off the bar.

Plunking down next to him, Grantaire poured the wine into the glasses.

Marius picked his up so forcefully Grantaire feared he would break it, "Uh, so Marius, what seems to be the problem?"

"Courfeyrac,"

"Huh, ya know, he said the shame thing," Grantaire replied, refilling Marius' glass discreetly, even though he had only taken less than a mouthful.

"What?"

"You pisshed him off too,"

Marius shrugged and took a gulp of wine. "Oh well, he'll bounce back,"

"That's the spirit," Grantaire decided it best not to tell Marius about The Bet. (E.G: I've already said he's drunk, I don't wanna type it out with everything he says, so just imagine it)

They started conversing aimlessly for a while and every so often Grantaire discreetly filling Marius' glass when his back was turned.

"She's b**eauti**ful!" Marius slurred, "She's got long chestnut hair, an' big blue eyes!" he hiccupped.

"Marius, yer drunk or something'" Grantaire yawned and laid his head on the table.

Marius looked at him bleary eyed, "Am not, only had one glass," Marius gestured to his filled glass.

"Oh, right," Grantaire forgot about the plan, "So, who's this girl ya keep yakkin' about?"

Marius leaned back in his seat with a happy/drunken smile on his face, "She's perfect,"

"Her name's Perfect?"

"No," Marius wagged a finger at him, "Don't be stupid, her name's Cosette,"

Enjolras' and Combeferre's heads snapped up from facing their textbooks to facing the pair.

"Oh! So that's her name!"

Marius nodded and hiccupped.

"Well, that's-a very interesting…" Grantaire slurred, dozing off.

Enjolras and Combeferre gave each other a significant nod and stood, quickly walking over to Marius and the sleeping Grantaire, "Uh, Marius I think you've had enough—" Enjolras reached over and took the glass from Marius' slack grip.

"Huh, whuh?" Marius slowly turned his head to face him, "Oh, hello Enjolrash,"

"Yes, yes, hello to you too, Marius. Now get up, time to go home," Enjolras said, scooting Marius' chair back.

"Ya know, I never –hic- liked you," Marius said sourly.

"Yeah, I'm not particularly fond of you either," Enjolras said bitterly.

"Don't antagonize him, Enjolras, the last thing we need is a violent drunk," Combeferre said, taking the wineglass from Enjolras and setting it on the bar.

"Fine, let's just get him out of here before he decides to break something expensive," Enjolras said, pulling Marius to his feet and tugging him out the backroom.

"Are there any expensive things in this place?" Combeferre asked as they went out the door

Once on the street, Combeferre hailed a cab.

"Where to, Mess—What happened to yer friend?"

"Marius here had a bit too much to drink," Enjolras told him, shoving Marius into the seat before telling the driver Courfeyrac's address and climbing into the seat across from him, followed by Combeferre.

"I told ya 'M not drunk!" Marius said unhappily.

"Then tell me, Marius," Combeferre held up seven fingers, "How many fingers do you see?"

Marius concentrated on and squinted at his hands, "I dun know, hold your damn hand still!"

"Exactly my point,"

Marius glared at him before he swayed slightly and fell onto his side on the seat, sound asleep. (Or 'Dead drunk' if you prefer)

SEVERAL MINUTES LATER

Enjolras and Combeferre groaned as they lugged Marius out of the carriage.

"Uh, monsieur, this isn't a free ride," The driver said impatiently, holding his hand out.

"Really? I had no idea that you had to pay!" Enjolras said sarcastically, as he struggled to keep a hold the lawyer, "How much?"

"7 francs,"

Enjolras and Combeferre dropped Marius on the ground in order to reach their pockets and hand him the money.

"Hey, uh, is your friend gonna be alright? He dun't look too good," the driver asked, pocketing the money.

"He's not my friend, and of course he's not alright, he's laying unconscious in the street," Enjolras said.

The driver scowled and drove away.

"Alright, grab his legs, we'll carry him in," Combeferre said, grabbing Marius by his upper arms.

Enjolras stooped down and grabbed Marius' ankles and they both lifted/dragged him to the door.

After entering, Enjolras and Combeferre dumped Marius into a nearby chair before approaching the landlady, who sat knitting in a separate chair, "Excuse me, Madame, which room is M. De Courfeyrac's?" Combeferre asked.

"Fifth floor, room 37," She said dully, not looking up. (E.G: No, I don't know what Courfeyrac's real address is, so for comedy's sake, just play along 8D)

"Let's get him and he can deal with Pontmercy," Enjolras said, heading up the stairs.

The old woman looked up, "M. De Courfeyrac isn't here right now, he went out for something," she then caught sight of Marius, who was mumbling sleepily, "What did you two do to him?!"

"We didn't _do _anything," Enjolras said indignantly, descending from the stairs, "He got drunk,"

"We're terribly sorry for the inconvenience," Combeferre added politely.

"Well, at least on of you has manners," She said, "Just take him up to his room,"

Combeferre and Enjolras each gave her a look that said '**Up five flights of stairs?!**'

"Well what are ya waitin' for? Get him upstairs," She prompted.

"Alright, alright, fine, Madame!" Enjolras said hauling Marius up, "We'll carry Pontmercy's sorry self up multiple flights of stairs to his room!"

He and Combeferre then struggled towards the stairs. Once Combeferre was on the first step, the Landlady called out to them.

"One moment, Blond one,"

"Yes?" Enjolras kept his back to her, for he didn't want to drop the poor drunken lawyer.

She hobbled up to him and clouted him upside the head with her heavy wooden cane.

Enjolras saw stars. He turned his head as far as he could to look at her "What in God's name—" . She, then, got him on the cheekbone.

"Learn how to respect your elders! And don't use the Lord's name in vain!"

Enjolras blinked hard, in shock.

"Now get M. Marius upstairs! He's drooling," She ordered, returning to her seat.

"Yes, Madame," Combeferre said hastily.

Enjolras nodded dumbly and continued his assent.

"Uh—Are you gonna be okay?"

"Yes, I'll be fine, let's get this Buonapartist upstairs and leave," Enjolras muttered bitterly, shaking his head in an attempt to clear it.

After much dragging and clopping up the steps, they trio made their way to the apartment's locked door, which as met with a vicious kick from Enjolras, who had just about enough.

"Don't smash the door! Do you want the landlady to get even madder?" Combeferre asked, pulling Marius into a sitting position on the floor against the door, who was still mumbling nonsense in his sleep.

"If you breathe a word about that I will—"

"Yes, yes, calm down, lets just get his key," Combeferre said as he fished into Marius' jacket pocket, then the breast pocket, then his pants' pockets, each time coming up empty.

"He doesn't have a key," he said straightening up.

"What do you mean he doesn't have a key?!" Enjolras demanded.

"As in we can't get in. And unfortunately for us, the landlady has taken quite a liking to Marius, and quite a disliking to you and won't respond well to a half-conscious Marius in the middle of the floor,"

Enjolras shook his head and headed for the steps, "Courfeyrac will come here sooner or later,"

Combeferre shrugged, "It's your funeral," He none-the-less followed him quietly down and once they were at the bottom, Enjolras glanced around the empty hallway, nodding before they soundlessly crept across the floor to the door. Until;

"Hold it!"

The revolutionaries halted and put their hands in the air. (E.G: Put your hands where I can see 'em! XD)

"Did you put M. Marius in his room?" She demanded, as she shuffled across the room to them.

Combeferre gulped and cast a sidelong glance at Enjolras who gave him an equally startled look, "Uh, you see, Madame, he didn't have his key,"

"Speak up, boy!"

"He's in the hallway!" Combeferre continued loudly.

"You left him there?" The old woman asked, curiously.

"Yes, what else would we do? Break in?" Enjolras asked, lowering his hands and turning around, Combeferre soon followed the suit.

"I don't like your tone," She sneered.

"Madame," Enjolras started, "I don't even like Marius and I'm not responsible for him!"

"You are now," She grumbled, going over to a wall with a series of key hooks hanging from it.

"Here's a key," She started, tossing a key sloppily to Combeferre, "Use it,"

"But Enjolras and I—" Combeferre defended.

"No buts! Move it!"

"But--"

"Shut up and go!"

The students sighed, "Yes, Madame," they said simultaneously.

"What are you waiting for!" She then swatted them both on the backside as the climbed the steps.

"Told you," Combeferre muttered.

"Shut up,"

After a few moments of silence and thought, Combeferre remembered Marius' ramblings at the café.

"Marius said something about a Cosette," Combeferre said musingly as they reached the third landing.

"Courfeyrac was complaining that Marius was hiding someone, evidently that someone is a She and that She is a 'Cosette'," Enjolras replied dully.

"Well, now, this is quite a paradox," Combeferre said absently, after another brief silence.

"How so?" They rounded another landing.

"The two who want her name don't have it and the two who don't care about it, have it,"

"You're right," Enjolras said as they reached their destined floor, "But I highly doubt that Marius is going to like that someone other than him knows her name,"

"He's not going to remember a thing," Combeferre assured as Enjolras dragged Marius away from the door so Combeferre could unlock it.

"What makes you so sure?" Enjolras asked, standing Marius up and supporting him by the under arms.

"He's a mumbling heap at the moment, this whole ordeal will be a haze for him," Combeferre explained.

"Good point"

Combeferre pushed the door open and Enjolras dragged Marius in backwards and dumped him on the couch before heading over to Courfeyrac's desk.

"Enjolras, honestly, you could at least put him face up," Combeferre corrected, flipping Marius on his back with difficulty, "You don't want him to suffocate,"

"I'll remember that next time I have to carry him home"

"Enjolras—"

"Yeah, I know. I'll leave a note for Courfeyrac," Enjolras said, writing a short message on a small slip of paper. That message was:

_I think this belongs to you,_

_E._

"I've had about all I can take of quality time with Pontmercy," Enjolras commented as he took a safety pin from the desk drawer and pinned it to Marius' coat.

Combeferre nodded "Oh well, at least he's not going to make it to meeting tomorrow morning,"

"Even if he wouldn't wake up with a hangover he wouldn't make it," Enjolras replied mildly, straightening up and walking out the door.

Combeferre closed and locked the door before following Enjolras down the back staircase and out of the building.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

E.G: I'm real sorry about the length of this and the abrupt end. (Blushes) For Achilles-Maiden, or A.M as I so lovingly dubbed her. 8D

Stay Tuned for Chapter 5!


	5. Strike two!

E.G: Okay-doodle, the next installment of 'What's in a Name?' enjoy.

Disclaimer: Hugo, A.K.A the-greatest-French-author-whoever-graced-the-planet, is not Enjy-Glomper, A.K.A the-not-so-great-not-so-French-Fanfic-author-kid-who-thinks-this-disclaimer-is-her-worst-yet . . . Sorry bout that.

And just for clarity's sake, let's say this takes place around mid-night to 2am Then the next morning.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Courfeyrac dragged himself through the apartment building's door several hours after Enjolras and Combeferre dumped a certain lawyer, disappointed that he had lost sight of Marius and that he hadn't gotten any closer to receiving so much as a syllable of _her_ name.

"Hello, Ma'am," He said tiredly as he passed the landlady's chair.

"M. De Courfeyrac, what in the world happened to M. Marius?" She asked, looking up from her knitting.

"I wouldn't know," Courfeyrac replied colorlessly as he started climbing the steps.

"Well, he's upstairs, two young men brought him here;didn't look too good."

Courfeyrac's eyes widened, "Who are you talking about?" He cried, flying back down the stairs.

"What do you mean?" The old woman said, returning to her knitting.

"Can you tell me what they looked like? Did either of them smell of alcohol? Did they tell you their names?"

"No, neither of them were drunk, one called the other fella 'Angelo' or 'Angela' or whatever, they said M. Marius got a mite tipsy, which was true, he was babbling when they got here, "

"Oh no!" Courfeyrac raced up the stairs two at a time as the lady shook her head, "And Marius always seemed like such a good boy,"

Courfeyrac threw the apartment door open and ran to the form curled up on the couch, "For the love of God, Marius! Wake up!" He then, viciously shook him by the shoulders,

"Hey!" Poor Marius cried, startled at what had woken him, "Let go-a me!" he ordered feebly, squeezing his eyes shut and weakly trying to push Courfeyrac away.

Courfeyrac lifted Marius into a sitting position, knowing there was only one person who could be responsible for this, "What happened! Did you give her name away to Grantaire? "

Marius opened eyes and narrowed his eyes against the light of a lantern outside the door, "I did what?"

"Focus Marius! I can't loose women for six months! I just can't! Now tell me what happened!"

"What in the hell are you talkin' about?" Marius muttered, it was unlike him to swear; but we shall give him the benefit of a doubt, he was under some stress.

"You're drunk! You had to be carried home! You can't seem to focus on one thing! Need I go on?"

Marius returned to his curled up position, ignoring him.

"Oh forget it!" Courfeyrac cried, agitated that Marius was even more of a half-wit when intoxicated.

Marius mumbled something in vague agreement before falling back asleep.

Courfeyrac sighed and turned to close the door but the small scrape of paper pinned to Marius' jacket caught his eye, "Hel-lo what's this?" he stooped down, pulled the note free of the pin and, after lighting a candle, scanned the message.

_I think this belongs to you,_

_E._

"E? But she said 'Angelo'," Poor Courfeyrac was losing hope fast; he then slunk off to bed, dreading what was to come.

THE NEXT MORNING

"Ohh . . .My head—" Marius groaned as he rolled himself off the couch and onto the floor with a resounding thud.

"Marius!" Courfeyrac cried, practically flying from his room.

Marius put a hand on his forehead, "Do you really have to yell?"

"Yes! I really do!" Courfeyrac crouched on the ground next to him, "Do you know what happened last night? Ah! There is only one person in the world who would do this!"

"Uh-uh," He acknowledged wearily, massaging his temples, "Ugh, I feel sick—"

"It's called a hang over, Dear Marius, one of life's miracles," Courfeyrac informed him.

"Lovely."  
Courfeyrac scowled and gripped his shoulders, "Marius, I need you to think."

"About what?"

"Last night's festivities, dear boy. Do you know what happened?"

Marius shook his poor pounding head.

"You got drunk,"

"Then I don't wanna know," Marius covered his ears childishly.

"Yes you do!" Courfeyrac sat him up again and yanked his hands away from his ears, " not only do you want to know; you _need _to know! Someone knows about what's-her-face!"

Marius' bloodshot eyes widened, "What!? Why!? How!?" He pulled free of Courfeyrac, "Who told you!"

"Uh, _I_ don't know the name, um, someone _else_ does—"

"Who! Who!" Marius yelled, now possessed by a strength that allowed him to ignore his throbbing head for a moment.

"I-I—" Courfeyrac grabbed his watch from his pocket and looked at it, "Oh no! I'm late! I'm meeting Lynnette in ten minutes" he lied as he stood quickly and ran to the door, without looking over his shoulder at Marius; who was in the process of dragging himself back onto the couch.

A FEW MINUTES LATER

"**Grantaire!" **Courfeyrac roared as he stormed into the back room, "You cheater!"

Grantaire, who had been sound asleep at the same table, awoke with a start, "Huh—"

He stormed up to the drunkard and shook him smartly by the collar, "He had to willingly tell us, you cheater!"

"Who?"

"Marius!"

"What about him?"

Courfeyrac stopped suddenly, "You-you don't remember either," he said calmly, "You just as clueless as Marius . . ."

"Remember what?" Grantaire asked, for he had more than three sheets into the breeze long before he even saw Marius the previous night.

"You don't remember either! Oh joy of joys!" Courfeyrac let him go and began to do a solo waltz, "Miracle of miracles! I still have a chance!"

Courfeyrac spun around the room merrily as Grantaire slammed his head repeatedly against the table.

At that moment, Enjolras nudged the door open, struggling with an assortment of books and maps.

"Enjolras! Good morning, my dear friend!" Courfeyrac exclaimed, continuing his waltz undisturbed.

Enjolras stared at him for a moment before his gaze shifted to Grantaire, who was sulking at his table, opened his mouth as if to say something then closed it as he piled his books on a near-by table and began sorting through them.

Courfeyrac finished his waltz with a swish, before turning towards him, "Well- hey, what happened to your face? Lose a fight with a horse?"

Enjolras looked at him blankly before he remembered his encounter with a landlady and a certain cane and quickly lowered and hid his red swelled face, "I'm not sure, must've bumped into something" he looked up, "Why are you here so early?"

"No reason," Courfeyrac shrugged "Just had to see a man about a wager, but I'll go home just the same," He said merrily as he started for the door.

"Is it about Pontmercy?"

The young womanizer stopped dead in his tracks, "M-Marius?"

Enjolras nodded.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Abrupt stop, oui. I'm not happy with the rest and I'll post it when I am happy.

But I'm really, really really, sincerely sorry for the lack of new chapters! I finished this one about a week after I posted chapter four but wasn't happy with it, so I've been tweaking it for almost a year now. (I can't believe it's been almost a year, I always wondered what took my favorite authors so long to update and now I know. Time flies!)

God on high, I'm so sorry, A.M!!!


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